FREE DAY of TANTRIC SELF-LOVE
Day 1 of TANTRIC SELF-LOVE
DAY ONE Most of us grew up reading fairy tales and waiting for Prince Charming to bring us our happily ever after. These stories served neither boys nor girls. Our traditional stories put pressure on the masculine to be the hero and portray the feminine as the damsel in distress. We grow up to act tough, suppress our emotions, and deal with it. We spend time, energy, money, and more looking for a romantic partner to meet our needs and fulfill our dreams. So many times we wait around to feel loved. We count on...Friends and family...Romantic partners...Material things and appearances...Money and titles...(A Hallmark holiday?!) to provide the nourishment our soul needs. And we always end up feeling empty. It’s time to be our own hero.
HERE’S THE SECRET: YOU DON’T HAVE TO BE SAVED BY A STRANGER. LOVE IS ALREADY WITHIN YOU.
Love should be experienced daily and not just on holidays. Self-love allows us to experience love every day. Once we realize this and tap into the ocean of love we already have, we can be filled with love, radiate love and attract more love into our lives. How does it work? Like attracts like. This is the law of the Universe. We think about a long-lost friend, and suddenly they call. We long for a night of dancing, and the invite appears. We have a bad day, but then a single moment brings us overwhelming joy and release. What we think, feel, and desire can flow from us and into being. So we must be the thing that we want to bring into our lives — love, joy, pleasure, and comfort.
SO WHY IS IT SO HARD?
Society says we need to become consumers and spend money on possessions to make ourselves attractive to others. People spend money on cars, clothes, jewelry and more. By striving to “buy” affection, we focus on the “outer” and neglect the “inner.” It is our inner world that truly defines us and once we love and accept ourselves, we are more loving and accepting of others. (Our outer world is a reflection of our inner world). By first learning to have a loving/healthy relationship with our inner self, we can share that love with those around us. When we feel we are lacking things in life we can find ourselves experiencing envy and jealousy and other negative emotions. When we feel empty, and lack self-love, we expect people outside of ourselves to fill this void. This places unrealistic expectations on those relationships and when they “fail” to make us feel loved...we become angry and lash out. This sabotages our relationships.
Why? Because…
EVERYTHING COMES THROUGH YOU, NOT TO YOU.
I experienced heartbreak many times. A few years ago (2014), I took a travel assignment to the Bay Area. I was isolated from friends, family and my lovers. I was wrapped up in “testing”. Who would really make the effort? Who would pursue me harder? Who would work more to achieve my love? I didn’t realize then how healing that alone time could be. I spent time going on adventures and to the movies alone, and went deeper in my understanding of Tantra. I focused on self. I began meditating. I reflected on my patterns in dating and realized that I had been choosing the wrong partners due to my fear of being vulnerable
I was not fully available, so I was attracting what was not fully available.
I was attracting those who, like me, weren’t fully present or able to give and receive love. So I began cultivating love in my life through Tantric self-love. I would treat myself to a pedicure or express gratitude, say loving words to myself, take bubble baths, exercise. I decided that I would show others how to love me by example. Once I felt fully supported by myself and wrapped myself up in self-love...something magical happened. I met a man and a beautiful romance bloomed. This relationship is like nothing I had ever experienced. We had both done our work to heal ourselves and we love ourselves and so loving one another was easy. Everything flowed beautifully between us and we continued to honor and love one another as we love ourselves. We meditated together, read, dance and share ecstatic bliss. I stopped searching outwardly and searched within and focused on my own growth and love and that’s when love found me. <Update, we did a conscious uncoupling 2 years later & this relationship was deeply healing for both of us.>
SELF-LOVE IS THE ACT OF SEDUCING YOUR OWN SOUL.
Self-love is your first true love. Like a cup, your love cannot overflow to others if your heart isn’t full first. You cannot receive what you deny yourself.
“HOW YOU LOVE YOURSELF IS HOW YOU TEACH OTHERS TO LOVE YOU.”
- RUPI KAUR
ACTION: How can you best say “I love you” to you?
I share some insight in this video.
Discover HOW in The 5 Love Languages. Learn your love language by taking this quiz.
Your love language is how you communicate love as both a giver and receiver. I discovered this book “The 5 Love Languages” and it shed a lot of light as to why so many people struggle in relationships. Imagine speaking two different languages and expecting the other person to understand you?! Disaster! My lover and I took the 5 Love Languages test at the beginning of our relationship and it was great to understand how we each feel loved by others. The Love Languages book helps you with your partners and your children, too. Often, when we perceive a child as being “challenging” it is because they don’t feel loved and understood. So this applies to all relationships. What a game-changer!
You’ve completed day 1 - Celebrate yourself! 🎉
If you feel ready to DIVE even DEEPER, you can get ALL 12 Days of Tantric Self-Love here! All of my clients prepare for our work together by building a strong foundation with these practices. Below, I share more about what’s included in the “Awaken Your Inner Lover: Tantric Self-Love in 12 Days” e-book.
“Awaken your inner lover: Tantric Self-Love in 12 days”
WHAT’S INCLUDED? 12 DAILY PRACTICES THAT TEACH ABOUT SELF-LOVE.
Each day has one action you can take to improve your self-love practice. Self-love is the foundation of all of my Tantra coaching and courses. People come to me craving more pleasure, better sex, multiple orgasms, and ultimate happiness in life and bed. My answer to that is to build on love and joy from within, and this will open the doors to your desires and let your sexual energy flow freely. For the next 12 days, you can practice these daily prompts designed to help you recognize yourself as your own friend, best lover, and source of power. Because when you fall in love with yourself — mind, body, and soul — you can share that love with the world. I began my healing journey with these practices & people write me all the time sharing the incredible results they’ve had and how they plan to do them EVERY day for even more love, magic, & bliss!
You can see a personal welcome to the challenge from me in this video. (All the links in this ebook are clickable with Adobe Acrobat, KINDLE + iBooks)
